Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Run, Fat-ass, Ruuunn!

Dillon bought me a really cool scale over the weekend. I was way excited to try out my new scale as it not only tells one how much they way but also BMI, body fat percentage, muscle weight and hydration levels. How cool is that?!?!

When I got it home, I ripped it from the packaging and hopped on. I am not sure why I was so surprised at the results. I have not exercised regularly for a long time. I look and feel fatter than I ever had before, so it's only a given that I would be the heaviest I have ever been. Yet I was still shocked and dismayed. I will not share the specifics of the numbers so you will just have to trust me.

The scale that I had so briefly loved even more quickly became my worst enemy. I will embrace this hatred though as a form of motivation. That is another reason for this post. I normally would not share this embarrassment with the world, but I am hoping that this too will be a source of motivation. I am hoping for the pressure/support from you will get and keep me going. Just the fact that I am posting this gives me someone to answer to so to speak, so please don't feel like I am calling on you to post motivational poetry to me or anything like that.

My goal is to lose 44 lbs of fat. I cannot believe that I have that much to lose, but that's the case. I could (probably should) lose more, but I want my initial goal to be achievable and realistic. In turn I am hoping to increase my muscle weight.

I will update my running blog periodically with hopefully my - fat % and + muscle weight and, of course, my running. So next time you see me, holla, "Run, fat-ass, RUUUUNNN!"


Dillon Hawkins said...

Don't be silly, you are the most petite and attractive of all the Amazons.

Sasha said...

Oh my gosh!!!! I was disturbed by Cerra's title, but I was horrified by Dillon's comment. Shame on you both. Believe you me, I am no stranger to the world of self depracation, but, if there is one thing I know with my whole self, it is that that world is evil and is a huge part of why we stay fat. So, while I'm thrilled that you are feeling motivated and getting ready to start running again, I am less than that with your comments about yourself. I simply urge you to leave the self defeat behind. I know what you and Dillon are probably both doing and thinking right now. Shaking your heads and saying "we're just kidding" and laughing of course at your wierd sister. But, here's my two cents. Love and nurture yourself. Be kind and good to yourself. DO NOT CALL YOURSELF A FAT-ASS or any other such endearments. Change the course of things by starting with what is in your head, then move on to what comes out of your mouth. 'Nuff said. I'm stepping off the soapbox now.

I am right there with you by the way, with the staggering number on the scale. I've been on and off of more plans and quests to get fit and be healthy than I could even begin to count. I always wished that I was a runner. Its such a great work out and its free. But, my friend, I'm not. I have however, recently joined a gym though. I started at Curves last August and went fairly consistently until January with about 10 lbs. lost and ultimately 15 lbs. gained. I moved on in March to a different gym . . . Body Renew and I hired a personal trainer. Drastic times call for drastic measures. In Feb. I worked out twice a week with the trainer and another 2-3 days a week on my own and by the end of the month had lost 7 lbs. and 10inches. This month I cut back to once a week training because its spendy. I'm still keeping up on an additional 3-4 times a week on my own though. I go up and down with my eating and the truth is, that the food part is the biggest part. Something like 85% of the equation. Most of all though, I have truly been taking what I have always known to heart. I am working harder on the loving myself just as I am thing than I am on anything else. I think its making a difference, but it is hard. Anyway, I'm with ya sister and I'm cheering you on from Alaska. We'll have to head back to Mexico for some swimsuit weather when we get a little closer to our goal. Oh, and by the way, I really envy your goal. My target is in the 60-70lb. range. I really try not to think about that though. I'm focusing more on the success of feeling better and even the success of simply not gaining. Anyway. . . lots of luck to you. Keep at it and don't let that scale bully you.

Cerra Hawkins said...

*awkward silence* 8-\